Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Me too!
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
