she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
