oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
our cab driver is having phone sex.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
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Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
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I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
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