It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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