Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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