My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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