Sry I called you an 8
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
i need some magic done to my vagina
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
