sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
