She is in my trunk
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
