I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
