I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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