whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
