Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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