ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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