If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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