ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
