we have officially lost it.
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Randomize
