make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Randomize
