Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
