at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
