I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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