Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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