"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
