Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Randomize
