I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
You're earring is so big in my mouth
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
