I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
