Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
