I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
