Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
