i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I didn't notice because vodka
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
