i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
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