Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
