Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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