"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I wish i was in the wii world.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
