forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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