also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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