how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
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