Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
