Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
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