Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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