Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
