The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Randomize
