so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize