i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
