i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
