I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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