took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
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