I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
