epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
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