I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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