He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize