i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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